Not so hard/The hardest part

Training for a 5K isn't so hard. Relationships are.

Couch to 5K week two training has begun and when session one was over I felt less challenged than the first week. It could be because I was on a treadmill. It could be the two minute rests between the 90 second runs. Maybe it was both. Maybe I'm in better shape than I thought. Regardless, I'm on the path to doing something new, something that I've always despised (running), and I am focused and prepared to do it.

Treadmills scare the crap out of me. It seems like the machine is in control and the person is not. I started out slow on both my walk and jog and by the end I was a full mph faster on each. I didn't fall or stumble. It felt great. I saw a very focused person in the mirror (weird who is THAT?). Fear challenged. Fear no more.

Relationships don't (or didn't) scare the crap out of me. Whether it be a working relationship, a friendship, or a love relationship, I've never really been scared of them. Nervous, tentative, insecure, yes. Never afraid. I can't exactly say that now.

They are unpredictable because people are. We are all on an individual journey and then we meet that one person we want to share our journey with and the next thing you know you are on a completely different highway going somewhere you've never even thought of. Love relationships tend to do this to people. Love is intoxicating and can be all consuming.

With everything I've learned in the last year (yes, it's almost been a whole year) it just hit me yesterday (after dinner with Guy Who Was My Whole Life) that the hardest part of a relationship is staying that person you were when your paths crossed. THAT person is who they fall in love with. THAT person is who they want to spend time with. Why in the world do people instantly start making changes in order to make sure the relationship will work?

I did it. His interests became mine. His desires became mine (even if they really weren't). I couldn't even decide what to eat without knowing what he was in the mood for. He changed too but only he can really figure out why.

I had this realization while we were having dinner recently. Not only am I physically back where I was at 19, I'm also ME again. Bubbly, energetic, happy, focused. He seems to be finding the old him too. The new old versions of us sat there and laughed and had a good evening. It reminded me why we fell in love in the first place.

Anyway, relationships are hard. If I can pass one piece of advice to anyone reading this it's this; Don't let the relationship be the treadmill. Whatever you do, control your path and pace. Don't stop being YOU. If the relationship can't work unless you change, then it probably isn't the right one.

Training for a 5K isn't that hard. So right now, I'm going to do that.