Dreams

Oh man. I'm so sorry. It's my first blog...and I'm reading over my description of why Brian Garbage and it totally sounds like I'm saying dreams are garbage. I don't think dreams are garbage at all. Dreams are great! Having dreams and goals is great...but I don't really know what mine are. No, I take that back. I do. I'm just not one of those people that latches on to things and believes in them so intensely I'll find away to get what I want no matter what. For example, I don't like religion. Whenever I've been in church (family is non practicing Catholic)I feel nauseated and annoyed because I do not understand how people can just do this or that because someone told them to. I'll go into that topic another day. Or not. What's another example? Well all this craziness I've seen over NKOTB. Women spending money I very much doubt they have and not even batting an eye. Not me. I've been saving since October recycling cans. I'm halfway to my goal. What I'm getting at is, I'm a realist. What I'm getting at is, I've always done what's expected of me, expecting certain results and if I don't get them...then I'm stuck. I went to college got good grades, now where is the amazing job? I'm not very good at stepping outside my comfort zone.
See? What a mess. That was pure flow of consciousness right there. One of my big struggles right now is...what am I doing with my life? What will make me want to get up every day and feel so excited to be doing it? That's why I love pop culture...Madonna...she loves what she does. The people that go on American Idol, they really love music/performing and will embarrass themselves just for the shot. Where do I find that kind of drive?

Speaking of American Idol. The new judge rocks! I especially love Kara's encounter with Bikini Girl. Newsflash to BG-Even if you do get by because of your voice through Hollywood you will be forever known as Bikini Girl on American Idol...not something you'll be proud of in 20 years I think.